Monday, July 30, 2007

The Compassion of the Left Strikes Again.

In response to word that Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts had a seizure, here's what Wonkette had to say:

Chief Justice John Roberts has died in his summer home in Maine. No, not really, but we know you have your fingers crossed.
It's gotten so predictable and commonplace that it's hardly shocking to see the rancid, seething hate that consumes the Left 24/7 and how freely they share their rage with the world. The irony is that they project their insanity upon conservatives and the Treason Media fosters this fraudulent meme.

Friday, July 27, 2007

Why Was Deanna Troi Allowed To Sit In On The Poker Games?

Seriously. What idiot would play cards with a mind reader at the table?

If It's Friday, It's Friday Fiver Catch-Up Time!

Only missed one week - not bad!

1. Favorite pastry?


2. How do you like to waste time?

I do I NOT like to waste time would be a shorter answer.

3. How would you describe your complexion?


4. What do you hang on to that you should really get rid of?

Old magazines, too-small clothes, hope.

5. What is the last thing that made you hurt?

Physically? Can't recall. Mentally? Coping with my mother's stroke and the insanity of the insurance system and my girlfriend breaking her arm and not going to the doctor for almost a week because she's uninsured and now facing bills for surgery. That's giving me a headache.


1. Tea or coffee?

Tea, if I'm looking for a beverage; coffee, if I need to wake up and can't smoke crack.

2. Do you speak your mind?

Look who you're asking.

3. What is your escape?

Wait...there's a way out of all this?

4. When is the last time you cried?

Probably the other night while talking about the f*cked-up nursing home I had to move my Mom into at an insane cost.

5. What are your bedtime rituals?

Make sure the hostages are still alive; set the alarm clock; release the hounds.

It All Depends On Whose Religion Is Being Separated.

That's how Powerline headlined this Ryskind cartoon:

Just as with Time magazine's "How the Democrats Got Religion" cover story with its takeaway that (paraphrasizing) "those stupid godbag Jeebus freaks don't like it when we call them what they are - superstitious rubes - so ixnay on the theist-ay-ay alk-tay", the last permissible form of outright bigotry allowed is against Christians. (Though anti-Semitism is enjoying a big comeback on the Left.) Combined with the mind-rotting poison of multi-culturalism, the will to stand up against this bigotry is weak in the public, making the Islamofascists plans all the easier, since who's gonna fight back when they don't believe in either God or country?

This has been a long-running conundrum for me as I've watched any non-liberal who dares mentions their faith get smeared as a theocratic moron while Dem after Dem get to march into the pulpits of black churches and campaign and pretend to share their faith. OK, it's not really confusing - liberals are hypocrites as well as bigots - but it's still annoying that they falsely claim the mantle of being "diverse" and "tolerant" when their fascistic actions are imposing speech codes, creating thought crimes in the guise of punishing "hate", and cause the systematic de-Godification of public life while cheerfully assisting in the Allahfication of the West.

Whether it's appeasement or just common cause against a common enemy - i.e. Christians - the Left hates the idea of any God that would stand above their self-anointed beliefs that they are deities unto themselves. This isn't to say that we need Pat Robertson as President [shudder] but a warning that in their eagerness to kill off all of one flavor of religion, the Left is ushering in a new Dark Age under the sword of a bloodthirsty creed practiced by barbarians over a thousand years past their bedtime.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Chris Matthews: Un-American Idiot

The unctuous Jay Leno gets falsely tagged as being friendly to the Stupid Party because he angled himself into the spotlight which Ahnuld ran for Governator of "Callieforneah". Despite having enough fuel-guzzling cars to make Al Gore want to try him for crimes against humanity, Leno's reliably leftist as anyone who hopes to keep working in entertainment.

Just now, he had loudmouth asstackler and former Dem operative Chris Matthews on and while Matthews has usually managed to restrain his seething rage against the Stupid Party, the pressure of matching fellow MSNBC moonbat Keith Olberman must be getting to him because he spent his entire segment spewing a litany of lies, distortions, bias and hypocrisy that made Air AmeriKKKa's Randi Rhodes sound sane.

And Leno didn't even try to rein him in.

I'm sure that the Blogosphere will be all over this and the video will pop up, but all that will show is that when Team Dubya has managed to alienate all but the most clueless of his supporters with his almost complete betrayal of conservative values, the noise generators of the fascist Left still can't resist lying about what's actually happening in the world and with the war. The biggest irony of Matthew's lies was the faux outrage over how he claimed Team Dubya was lying because people couldn't keep our enemies straight.

Chris Matthews is a fascist partisan and Jay Leno is a fellow traveling hypocrite. Too bad that Osama and the Islamofascists - cool band name! - will reward their cooperation in the same way that Baltar was rewarded by the Cylons in the original "Battlestar Galactica" movie.

Fun With Redubbed Propaganda!

I've been a big fan of movie trailer mash-ups, but these are slightly different beasts. Instead of selectively cutting the films to make a new ironic piece, the guys at have taken the actual promotional films meant to make potential customers think that what's being shown is soooooooooooooo cool that they can't live without it and by simply replacing the narration, effectively killed any cool factor these products may've had.

First up is their takedown of the Microsoft Surface computer which promises to bring the whiz-bang niftyness of "Minority Report" to the masses. I heard the audio for this a couple of weeks ago on the TWiT podcast, but just saw the video today.

What prompted me to look that video up was this next one which my boss told me about. I had heard something about the "Wii Fit" game-ish thing in the E3 Lite coverage, but since I don't care about the Wii, I didn't pursue more info. After watching this video, I can't imagine anyone wanting it.

Not since "South Park" preemptively destroyed the Goreacle with their invaluable "ManBearPig" episode have goofy ideas been so thoroughly trashed by mocking.

Buy Me This Shirt!!!

Sorry there isn't a larger and better picture...

...but it says, "AD/HD Back In Bla... Hey Look, A Squirrel!"

I take an XL. Thanks!

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Friday Fiver Double-Shot Edition

A brief break from the inanity and madness to catch up.

1. Have you ever gone fishing?


2. Do you have an aquarium?


3. Do you eat fish?


4. Have you ever seen Finding Nemo?


5. What do you think of Sushi?

Like it a lot.


1. What do you do?

That voodoo I do so well.

2. What makes you pay attention?


3. What's your inspiration?


4. Do you believe in magic?

In the form of Anne Hathaway nudity, ABSOTIVELY!!!!

5. What is your favorite subject to write about?

Quantum whateverness.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

File Under: DUH!!!

A strong contender for "Most Obvious Headline" honors: Women drawn to men with muscles.

Muscular young men are likely to have more sex partners than their less-chiseled peers, researchers at the University of California Los Angeles said on Monday.
As Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ frequently told his Apostles, "NO F*CKING SH*T, SHERLOCK!!!"

My tax dollars better not be at work here, dammit!

Monday, July 09, 2007

"Et tu, babycakes."

Life is sucking particularly hard today, but rather than hector about the ills of the world much, I'm feeling more in the silly frame of mind, thus this story about the results of "Slate's Action-Movie One-Liner Contest" which include:

In the puzzling-yet-strangely-compelling category, Brian Charles Mackinson coins a threat that sounds like a poorly translated subtitle from a grade-Z martial-arts movie: "My karate will disintegrate your genitals." C.F. Harkins imagines a hero's last words to his nemesis as these: "I'm canceling your elocutionist's appointment." Matthew Durand's protagonist is slightly more straightforward: "Your ass is about to get its own ass handed to it." And Steven Hutchins goes meta (and just plain weird) with "Dénouement-ized, man-kisser!"

Joe Martin of Roseburg, Ore., cuts to the chase with "Less talk, more dying," and Mike Spradlin Jr. takes the prize for pithiness with the sprightly "Toodles!" (I particularly like imagining that one in the voice of Steven Seagal.)
Wacky. If I'd known about this contest, maybe I could've entered something like, "I've been killing punks your age since I was your age." Or maybe not.

Sprint To G.I. Joe: Click!

Sprint cut off 200 military personnel for "excessive roaming" - because we all know soldiers just wander aimlessly of their own volition - only to back off a little when the bad press started to singe. Jerks.

A commenter also points out that Verizon sucks, which is old news because they cripple the phones they sell to force users to use their services. ATT&T/Cingular also blows goats, as legions of iPhone chumps are finding out.

Let's hear it for T-Mobile, if only for having the hottest spokesperson:

...though I see in the stories that came up when searching for pix that she's being phased out. Lovely. String and two cans, anyone? (Yeah, CZ-J had the two cans alright.)

Friday, July 06, 2007

ZOMG!!! Friday Fiver Quinto-Play!!!

Gawd, it's been ages since I've done this, so let's catch up on a month's worth, shall we?

1. What do you do?

Frighten the fascist Left with my unrelenting quest for the Truth.

2. What makes you pay attention?


3. What's your inspiration?


4. Do you believe in magic?

In the case of Anne Hathaway's boobs, yes, I do!

5. What is your favorite subject to write about?

Boobs. (Unfortunately, they're most likely to be the political type and not the fun "joy globe" versions.)


1. What troubles you?

That so many people are panicking about fictional bogeymen like ManBearPig while ignoring genuine threats to survival like Islamofascists.

2. Do you like thunderstorms?

Meh. They make me worry about all my electronic stuff getting zapped.

3. Do you sleep easily or toss and turn?

I sleep so hard that I'm legally dead in 23 states.

4. What do you offer a friend?

Honest advice. (They usually don't want it though.)

5. Friday fill-in: Please don't ___.

Vote for Democratic-liberal-socialist fascism.


1. Have any road trips planned?


2. What is out of your reach?

Anything more than a few feet away.

3. Are you more likely to watch a sunset or the sun rise?

Sunset. I'll only see a sunrise if I've been up all night.

4. What night will you never forget?

The night Angelina Jolie and I made mad, hot, sweet, monkey love. (That is, I won't forget it once it happens.)

5. What's the last thing that made you scream?

Hmmmm...can't recall, though I was startled into screaming while playing Half-Life.


1. When do you doubt yourself?


2. Who do you owe an apology?

No one.

3. When is the last time you felt embarrassed?


4. What do you ignore?


5. Do you love yourself?

No more than everyone else does.


1. Are you attracted to the naughty or the nice?

The nicely naughty.

2. Do you let your dirty laundry pile up?


3. What's the last excuse you made?

"She said she was 18."

4. Do you play it safe or do you take risks?

I take the safer risks.

5. Friday fill-in: Let's go to ____ and ____.

Bar; work.

Lefty Sez: "At Least Hitler Meant Well"

Just when you think that the ravages of Bush Derangement Syndrome can't get any worse, you see something like the Huffington Post item discussed in this Power Line Forum thread which amidst the spittle-inflected ravings is included this bon mot:

You could argue that even the world’s worst fascist dictators at least meant well. They honestly thought were doing good things for their countries by suppressing blacks/eliminating Jews/eradicating free enterprise/repressing individual thought/killing off rivals/invading neighbors, etc. Only the Saudi royal family is driven by the same motives as Bush, but they were already entrenched. Bush set a new precedent. He came into office with the attitude of “I’m so tired of the public good. What about my good? What about my rich friends’ good?”
Considering Dubya and the Stupid Party are doomed due to their out-of-control socialist activities - No Child Left Behind, Medicare drug benefits, billions in unaccounted for Katrina handouts, and the rewarding of invaders with free everything to name but a few sins - the idea that Dubya hasn't been doing anything but bankrupting the nation in the lunatic quest to spread "compassion" at the expense of the citizenry is not only blatantly false, but reeks of the madness BDS causes.

Subsequent posters note that the author is a former sports journalist, just like the unhinged Keith "Worst Asstackler Alive" Olberman was. What is it about hanging out with minorities that make tens of millions of dollars for playing games and serve as role models for the yoots of America that makes these morons so obsessed with the idea that the world is nothing but an unjust hellhole and that only liberal fascism can balance the scales? Pitiful.

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Rock Stars Against Live Earth

As I mentioned in the previous post, Savior of All Humanity, Al Gore, is putting on a big concert in the Live Aid/Live 8 mold called Live Earth which is meant to raise awareness of the fictional junk science phenomena that has people crapping themselves to fix, ManBearPig*.

Well, not everyone is bending over and grabbing the ankles for this scam and someone has started the blog Rock Stars Against Live Earth which catalogs comments against these sorts of events with the top of the site displaying this acid crack from Saint Bob Geldolf, creator of the modern benefit concert/broadcast format:

But why is (Gore) actually organizing them? To make us aware of the greenhouse effect? Everybody’s known about that problem for years. We are all f--king conscious of global warming."
Well, Bob, Gore is organizing it because he's a loser who failed at fulfilling the destiny his anti-civil rights father, Sen. Al Gore (Gore is actually a Jr.; his drunken driving loser kid is the III of the line of Gore losers), to become President and now has reinvented himself as Savior of All Humanity. Nevermind that humankind is more likely to die in the nuclear fire of Islamofascist terror than a super hurricane fueled by global warming.

Check out the whole thing - it's a quick read - to see all the common sense head-shaking at the sophistry of this scam and how John Lennon had little use for benefit shows in general. I especially liked this post about Al Gore III's latest peccadillo which I covered in my last post.
Energy-efficient Toyota Prius can hit 100 MPH, as proven by police radar, even if you’re drunk and carrying a bag of weed and a bunch of pills. Who knew?

Al Gore III has already raised my awareness this week more than his dad ever will.


* In case someone not familiar with the lingo has wandered onto Dirkworld®, ManBearPig refers to a brilliant episode of "South Park" which ran in April 2006 in which Al Gore comes to town to frighten everyone with tales of the fearsome ManBearPig, a creature that is "half-man, half-bear, and half-pig" (add it up). To try and scare people Gore dresses up in a costume...

...and reveals himself to be the pathetic attention whore he is.

While "South Park" did some of their all-time greatest social commentary satire in their 10th season - "Cartoon Wars" led to Comedy Central being referred to as "Comedhimmi Central" after the network caved into Islamofascist terrorism and censored the episode - this episode was particularly useful because it aired a few months ahead of Gore's eventual Oscar-winning fantasy film's debut, so that savvy folks laughed at and ignored this steaming pile of lies right out of the gate. Three cheers for Matt and Trey! Henceforth, I've always referred to it as "An Inconvenient ManBearPig", though for this spoof poster, I just did a slight edit of the title so as not to lose the readers at another site.


UPDATE: In an article about how NBC will be broadcasting the concerts, news anchor Ann Curry vomited this bon mot:
She said that the concert arrives at a particularly momentous time.

"This has been the year where I think the world has come to a kind of reckoning that there may be some validity to all of this discussion about climate change," Curry said. "It's come around to the idea that maybe we should take this seriously."
1. According to the Goreacle, all debate is over for we are all truly doomed if we don't take his anti-American/anti-capitalist/pro-fascist/pro-Gore worshiping prescriptions and implement them, so to say that "there may be some validity" is a sign of eco-Holocaust denial and less than true belief. Off to the reeducation camp with her!!!

B. There is a name for people who are beguiled by the Goracle's codswallop: F*CKING MORONS!!!! And Ann Curry seems to qualify for that designation indeed. Stick to reading the TelePrompter, Ann, and don't forget to say "Go f*ck yourself, San Diego!"


UPDATE #2: From

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Al Gore III Busted. Again. Will Leno Make Jokes?

We all know that the Bush twins are a pair of drunken party girls, right? Why? Because the late-night comedians and the Treason Media have diligently made sure that every one of their foibles is documented and mocked. (Because the idea of a college-age girl with a fake ID to party with is an impeachable offense.) Only the fact that the Olsen twins are genuinely more f*cked up has spared us constant reportage of the adventures of Barbara (the cute one who looks like Thora Birch) and Jenna (the blonde who looks ready to perform for the "Girls Gone Wild" cameras).

All along, though, I've wondered why the substance and driving crimes of Al Gore III, son of the former Veep and current self-anointed Savior of All Humanity, have gone barely reported and joked upon? Could it be the usual M.O. of the Treason Media in covering up the sins of their fellow travelers?


Whether it was AG3 getting pulled over for going 94 mph and reckless driving by North Carolina police in August 2000 when Daddy was trying fulfill his destiny to rule over us, or being charged with pot possession after driving without headlights in December 2003, the powers in charge of information and entertainment kept it on the DL. Mustn't tarnish the prince's crown, right?

For his latest stunt, AG3 got popped for driving a blue Toyota Prius - at least he walks the talk his daddy is too important to be bothered with - about 100 mph on the San Diego Freeway, smelling of marijuana and in possession of less than an ounce of marijuana along with Xanax, Valium, Vicodin and Adderall (which is used for attention deficit disorder) without having prescriptions for any of the drugs. Gore was being held in the men's central jail in Santa Ana on $20,000 bail.

As if he wasn't already protected by his daddy's elite pals, he also will catch a break because the news broke on a holiday and Leno, Letterman et al are on vacation this week and by next week this will be old news. (Not that decades of sobriety spared Dubya from drunk jokes. Funny how that works, no?)

Also, Big Daddy Al is having his big fake charity concert this weekend to "raise awareness" of the ManBearPig problem and the TM won't be interrupting Gore's latest glory moment with inconvenient personal truths (i.e. his kid is a doped-up road hazard) or pointing out that many of his claims in "An Inconvenient ManBearPig" are disproven fibs.

In other words: Just another day of business as usual.


UPDATE (7/6/07): On the morning CBS Radio News, they had a item that AG3's problems show that prescription drug abuse is rampant and he's nothing out of the ordinary. In other words, everyone does it.

If this sounds familiar, it may be because while Bill Clinton was perjuring himself, abusing his office and obstructing justice, the Treason Media rushed forth with stories about how monogamy was unnatural and how everyone lies. Anything the Left needs to do to excuse the malfeasance of their allies - defining deviancy down, as Daniel Patrick Moynihan described it - they will do while holding non-liberals to a higher standard. (e.g. Stupid Partier Mark Foley sending creepy sex e-mails to 17-year-old male pages is BAD!!! Dem. Garry Studds actually f*cking 17-year-old male pages is A-OK!!!)

NBC’s Emotional Terrorism and the Treason Media's Preference For Useful Lies Over Inconvenient Truths

While everyone has beaten up on CBS for accentuating the "BS" portion with their fraudulent reporting over the years, NBC has managed to slide on their own shameful record of misconduct - anyone remember how they rigged trucks to explode for a report?

Hot Air has a Vent episode that shows that a May NBC News report about body armor for our troops was yet another sadly typical example of the Treason Media in action:

On May 17, NBC reported a blockbuster exclusive report on the superiority of Dragon Skin body armor over Interceptor, the body armor that the US Army issues to soldiers in combat zones. But NBC’s story has a major flaw: It’s wrong about nearly everything.
As if that wasn't enough, Instapundit wonders:

Because that might help Bush.

UPDATE: A journalist whose name you'd recognize emails:

Yon's story doesn't get attention because it is humiliating.

It is humiliating because it is obvious that we media – and our allies in the state department, the legal trade, the NGOs, the Democratic Party, the UN, etc., - can’t do squat about such determined use of force.

Our words, images, arguments and skills can’t stop the killing. Only the rough soldiers and their guns can solve the problem, and we won’t admit that fact because the admission would weaken our influence and our claim to social status.

So we pretend Yon’s massacre – and the North Korean killing fields, the Arab treatment of women, the Arab hatred of Israel, etc. - doesn’t exist, and instead focus our emotions and attention on the somewhat-bad domestic things that we can ‘fix’ with our DC-based allies. Things such as Abu Ghraib, wiretapping, etc. When we ‘fix’ them, then we get status, applause, power, new jobs, ego, etc.

Please don’t be surprised. We media are an interest group not much different from the automakers, the unions, and the farmers.

Sadly, this makes sense. And this fits the pattern.

The funny thing about the Left is that they're constantly shrieking about how the "truth" is being covered-up an imaginary news media that they see as controlled by Team Dubya, REAL news is actually being ignored in favor of terrorist propaganda from factions allied with those actually committing atrocities.

So much for that reality-based existence they claim to live.


UPDATE: Day By Day notices, too.

Monday, July 02, 2007

Linkin Park Parody

Humor needs Truth to be funny. This parody has the Truth, therefore it is funny.